Starting school can be a tricky time for both parents and kids. This can be exciting as well as scary as both parents and kids don’t know what is in store for them.
And the only question you see asking yourselves is – Is your kid ready for school?
The simple answer is No!
If you are wondering how to prepare your child for school, then keep reading..
The Truth is that your kid will never be ready to go to school. You are his safe space and he would like to be in his comfort zone as much as he could. You both are going to have separation anxiety and it is okay. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t send them to school.
While many parents focus on teaching alphabets, numbers, colors and what not, forget to teach the basic life skills and strengths. We need to look at the child as a whole rather than focusing only on academics.
Here are some life skills that you can help your child enhance instead of focusing only on alphabets and numbers (after all that is what they are going to teach them)
Life Skills to teach your child before starting school
- Communicating basic needs: You may be able to read your child’s emotions and actions and help them with what they want but teachers and assistants will take some time in understanding that. Teach your child how to communicate their basic needs like hunger, thirst, loo breaks, potty breaks etc.
- Sharing: Most of the kids being single child, may not know how to share a toy. Take your kids to playdates or workshops where they understand the concept of sharing or taking turns.
- Socializing: Greeting new kids, being kind to them, not forcing them to be friends are some basics that you can work on when you take your kids to park or on playdates.
- Safe and Unsafe Touch: With rising cases of child abuse, it is imperative that we teach our kids the correct names of the body parts and talk to them about safe and unsafe touch, age appropriately. Inform them that the helper aunty will help her change the clothes if required and how to react in unsafe situations.
- Expressing their feelings: Acknowledge their feelings while at home or even outside. Help them name their feelings like angry, sad, excited, happy etc. Acknowledging negative emotions is as important as the positive ones. Teach them how to calm down or let it out when they are sad of angry. Help them understand that it is okay to cry and inform an adult than getting into a fight.
These social, emotional and self-care skills are more important than the academic skills that you might be teaching your child. Remember, each child is different and all of them may not be their strength, the objective is to help them work on their strengths while enabling them to overcome their weaknesses.
Along with teaching them social, emotional and academic skills, it is important to help them understand the concept of school and how it works differently than home, park, playdate or any other place that your kid has been.
Keep reading to know how to prepare your child for school.
How to prepare your child for school?
- Familiarize them: Be it for kindergarten or preschool, talk to your kid about the concept of school. Paint an interesting picture with teachers and other kids who can be friends, more toys, new activities etc. Take them with you when you go school hunting. Show them around and talk about the environment. Bring up school in day-to-day thing like while eating or dressing up and how it will be when they start going to school. This will help them predict the things and relate it when they go to school.
- Involve Them: Involve them while you get their things ready for school. Involve them in shopping for supplies. Let them choose their clothes, lunch boxes, bags, bottles etc. Discuss tiffin and breakfast menus with them. Involve them while chalking out their new routine and explain how things will be different. Let them hear when you talk about their school and let them pitch in and share their thoughts on the same.
- Talk to Them: Talk to your kids about their new school, teachers, activities that they will do, in a positive way. While you talk to them about it all, don’t over do it. Keep it casual than having “the talk” and then forgetting about it. Talk about their new routine, after school activities, who will drop and pick them up etc. Make it sound as exciting as you can.
- Reassure them: Kids are afraid in new environment. They are afraid that once you leave them, you will not come back. Tell them that they will be safe in school. Teacher and the assistants will take care of them. Reassure them that Mommy/Daddy will pick them up after dropping at school. If you are opting for pick up and drop services, then talk to them accordingly. Give them something to remember you when they miss you like a heart on the hand, a handkerchief, a band etc. Tell them that you are going to miss them too and it will be okay as you will wait for them to come back and then you will have a lot of fun.
- Don’t threaten them: Never use school or teacher as a way to threaten them. Don’t tell them that their teacher is going to punish them or you will leave them in school (Yup, some parents do) This will only create a fear in them and will make them see school as an unsafe place which will make the transition harder, for both you and your kid.
All this said, the truth is, no matter how much you prepare them, they are going to cry as soon as you leave them in the school. You are going to feel anxious no matter how mentally prepared you are.
And it is okay!
Talking to them and preparing them makes the transition easier and helps them predict the changes. They will know what is coming for them and they will be ready to handle it, even without their mommy or daddy around. You will have to be stronger than them as they beg you and plead you not to leave them in that unknown place but this discomfort is a part of growth and you both will cherish this new milestone for life.
To share our experience, our kid had grown up in covid era and had hardly interacted with other kids by the time he was to start pre-school. We started arranging playdates at home which gave him an opportunity to play with other kid(s) in a safe environment. As he has never been to playschool or kindergarten, we started him with a “Settlers” program for 3 months followed by one month summer camp before he started at Nursery grade. This had really helped us with his transition. It took him 2 weeks to settle down when he first started in settlers’ program but then he settled in less than a week when he started pre-school.
The most important thing that you can do to prepare your kid for the first day of school is to for you to relax. The more stressed you are, it will reflect on them. Let go and let them explore the new environment. Some kids may take longer than other kids to settle in but it is okay. The key is to be consistent and talking about school and its environment so that they feel safe in there.
Parents should be laying foundations to help their kids to be happy, confident little souls who are as independent as they can be. It’s about learning life skills, not just school skills.
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Disclaimer: The views expressed in the article are solely based on author’s experience. Please do not consider it as professional advice.